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matchmaker / July 16, 2018

Dating Your In-Laws

The in-law relationship is one that is often fraught with controversy and misunderstanding. Even with a great relationship and the best intentions, in-law issues can be a burden on any couple. Just like any family, you and your in-laws will argue and disagree but unlike your family, they might be less inclined to forgive and forget. Here are a few tips to make living with in-laws a little bit easier for everyone.

For more advice, we also have articles on Love and Financial Security and Politics and Love

Dating your In-Laws

1 – Your Relationship is Your First Priority

Your family has been with you through everything, and your partner’s parents have been with them through everything. This is an important bond, but not as important as your new relationship. In the end, it is the two of you that are a team. Your priorities and interests should always be more important than both of your families. Make sure that even when you compromise there is joint communication and decision making.

2 – Boundaries

Creating strong boundaries is important for relationships and for in-laws especially. This can be particularly important if you live in the same area as your partner’s parents. Don’t encourage unannounced visits or last-minute overnight stays as this can branch into more and intrude on your time as a couple.

3 – Jealousy

Unfortunately, working around your in-laws also means working around your parents. If you start spending unequal amounts of time with one family the other could get jealous and it might make interpersonal relationships between the two strained. Keep holidays equitable and if you have children try to make sure they spend enough time with both sets of grandparents.

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